iye gw kecewa
gw bukannya campur aduk masalah atau whatever... gw kemaren baca blog cuman sekilas, cuman mau tau aja apa salah gw... lo tau gak sih, pas lo sms yg "gw sensi blablabla, baca blog" gw tuh langsung dr seneng trus ke "WTF? What now? what the hell did I do wrong?" makanya gw langsung telp elo... kok rasanya adaaaaa aja gw salahnya... gw sampe bingung makanya gw telp elo... trus di telp juga lo gak mau bilang... itu ngeganjel di hati gw tau! lo udah ngerusak hr gw terus terang aja... biarpun gw cek email di rumah Jared n found out that it was just a joke... it was a cruel joke!
Gimana perasaan lo kalo misalnya setelah gw marah2 hr ini, trus gw sms elo yg isinya "hahaha gw cuman becanda!" apa lo gak ENEG? ya itu yg gw rasain kemaren... cuman ya krn gw emang gak mau let u ruin my night, jd ya gw push aside n gw nyantai2 aja deh... tp td pas baca blog yg bener, baru balik lg tuh perasaan eneg itu...
trus ditambah lg lo nulis yg :eneg ? IYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA . ... baru sampai langsung hari berikutnya di bombardir dgn kata kata tai ...
yg ternyata ga ada guna nya ! toh hari ini MENS ! ==> iya tp kan waktu hr senin gw belon mens n gw lg panik! n lo sms gak bakal hamil dll tp lo gak jelasin KENAPA gak bakal... dodol! geblek!
mana pas hari itu gw capek banget kaga karuan , kerjaan , meeting , dan dapet sms kayak begituan , kayak ga ada pengertian sama sekali rasa nye ...===> lo coba mikir kalo nulis gitu... lo tau bgt kalo gw tuh perasa n langsung dimasukin ke ati... bisa2nya joke kayak gitu! there are truths in every joke, u know... jd emang itu yg lo rasain waktu itu? gw gak ada pengertian dll? ok, fine! ternyata emang sia2 aja kayaknya... no matter what I do, I don't love u enough or I don't love u as much as u love me or whatever... u can't treat me like this! I feel shitty!
gw tuh merasa like... only ur love for me that counts... it doesnt matter how much I love u n stuff... pokoknya u love me more than I can ever love u, jd itu justify everything u do... even ur cruel jokes are ok cuz I will never love u as much as u love me anyway...something like that... that's the impression I get... sorry if I'm wrong, but maybe u need to do something about the way u express urself... cuz I misunderstood...
td setelah marah2 n kesel ke elo akhirnya ketiduran juga gw... trus mimpiin elo, gak inget apa sih... but u were with me n when I woke up, I just wanted to cry cuz I missed u so much... but of course, I was supposed to be mad @ ya... so I didn't say nothing... u know I can't be mad at u for long... a few hours is all it takes, n then I'm usually fine... but that's NOT the point... the point is, u need to take me more seriously! don't just be like "oh she's just over reacting, she'll get over it blablabla" I hate that!
n the way u said sorry "iya sorry blablabla" kelanjutan dr sorry nya itu yg bikin gw tambah eneg...kayak gak tulus... malah sarcastic gitu... nusuk bgt... bukan kata2 sorry lo yg gw mau... I want u to take me more seriously n not just take for granted the fact that I love u very much so u can do whatever n I won't love u any less... gw mau lo lebih mikirin soal perasaan gw juga...
jgn krn gw "in control" atau gw cuek atau gw bisa handle trus lo salah gunain...
trus kalo dah ngaku salah tuh selalu ada buntutnya... yg buntut2nya selalu balikin blame ke gw! jd kayaknya gw yg jahat n gak mikirin perasaan elo n gw yg gak ada pengertian dll...
lo tuh bener bener susah di ngertiin , gw sendiri ini hari ke 4 gw ga bisa tidur ! ===> hahaha, well, mister, u're not exactly easy to understand either!
dan gw udah bilang sorry pun masih tetep aja di bilang gini gitu bla bla bla .. ==> sorry sorry, tp lo tau gak kenapa gw marah n lo ngerti gak apa yg gw mau? gak kan...makanya gw tambah eneg pas lo bilang sorry, apalagi yg ada buntutnya yg gak enakin... tssss
udah lah, pokoknya gw minta laen kali jgn anggep remeh perasaan gw n kalo becanda ya mikir dulu n make sure ditulisan tuh kalo gw baca ya gw gak misunderstand... yg jelas dikit kalo becanda! kalo lo ngomong sama nulis kan laen bgt... mana gw tau lo becanda atau gak, gw kan gak bisa liat lo nahan ketawa, dll...
saat itu gimana sih reaksi gw ? pertama trima telphone gw berusaha nyantai , habis itu kan gw juga diem . .. kok rasa nya elu dendam bgt dgn hal ini ..==> gw bukannya dendam... gw sakit ati aja krn lo expect gw utk otomatis tau kenapa gw gak perlu takut dll... padahal gw gak tau sama sekali! lo bayangin gak sihhhhh... susah bener gw mau jelasinnya... mungkin buat lo soal ini tuh nothing... tp buat gw, it's a BIG thing! kalo sampe gw hamil beneran, hidup gw ancur... my life would be ruined, my family's name would be ruined, my future would be ruined, everything would be messed up! n lo dgn santainya bilang "gw tanggung jawab blablabla" it's not that! I don't doubt that u will take responsibility... gw gak kawatir soal itu, ngerti gak sih loooo... it just CANNOT happen! susah dah utk lo ngerti soal ini... gak bakal juga kali. apalagi dgn lo sms "gak bakal, tenang aja" tssssss... kasih garansi buta gitu, tanpa jelasin kenapa gak bakal, dll... emang lo pikir gw bisa baca pikiran lo kaliii??? gw tuh down yg bener2 down tau! u have no idea! gw 2 hr sampe pucet, keringet dingin, takut setengah mampus, tidur mimpi buruk terus, mau nangis teriak2, ngomong sama org aja rasanya susah setengah mampus krn gw nahan nangis n nahan eneg n nahan perasaan yg bener2 uggghhhh... belon pernah gw rasain tuh kayak gitu! rasa yg bener2 mau mampus yg gw tuh sampe sempet mikir mau beli obat tidur n telen obat sebotol! gila kan gw sampe kepikir gitu... ya itu yg gw rasain! segitu intensenya n lo gak ngerti! buat lo tetep aja no big deal krn lo bakal tanggung jawab n gw gak bakal hamil juga dll... but I didn't know none of that at the time...u never explained it to me! ngerti??? jd udah sepantesnya kalo gw bener2 anggep masalah ini big deal...krn gw sampe suicidal! kalo lo gak jelasin hr itu juga, mungkin gw udah mati sekarang, ngerti??? I was seriously thinking of killing myself!
anyways, I'm tired, goin to bed...besok kerja ... gw dah gak marah ato kesel... tp gw minta jgn selalu anggep enteng semuanya! have fun with GG
L u 2 much,
M
Gimana perasaan lo kalo misalnya setelah gw marah2 hr ini, trus gw sms elo yg isinya "hahaha gw cuman becanda!" apa lo gak ENEG? ya itu yg gw rasain kemaren... cuman ya krn gw emang gak mau let u ruin my night, jd ya gw push aside n gw nyantai2 aja deh... tp td pas baca blog yg bener, baru balik lg tuh perasaan eneg itu...
trus ditambah lg lo nulis yg :eneg ? IYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA . ... baru sampai langsung hari berikutnya di bombardir dgn kata kata tai ...
yg ternyata ga ada guna nya ! toh hari ini MENS ! ==> iya tp kan waktu hr senin gw belon mens n gw lg panik! n lo sms gak bakal hamil dll tp lo gak jelasin KENAPA gak bakal... dodol! geblek!
mana pas hari itu gw capek banget kaga karuan , kerjaan , meeting , dan dapet sms kayak begituan , kayak ga ada pengertian sama sekali rasa nye ...===> lo coba mikir kalo nulis gitu... lo tau bgt kalo gw tuh perasa n langsung dimasukin ke ati... bisa2nya joke kayak gitu! there are truths in every joke, u know... jd emang itu yg lo rasain waktu itu? gw gak ada pengertian dll? ok, fine! ternyata emang sia2 aja kayaknya... no matter what I do, I don't love u enough or I don't love u as much as u love me or whatever... u can't treat me like this! I feel shitty!
gw tuh merasa like... only ur love for me that counts... it doesnt matter how much I love u n stuff... pokoknya u love me more than I can ever love u, jd itu justify everything u do... even ur cruel jokes are ok cuz I will never love u as much as u love me anyway...something like that... that's the impression I get... sorry if I'm wrong, but maybe u need to do something about the way u express urself... cuz I misunderstood...
td setelah marah2 n kesel ke elo akhirnya ketiduran juga gw... trus mimpiin elo, gak inget apa sih... but u were with me n when I woke up, I just wanted to cry cuz I missed u so much... but of course, I was supposed to be mad @ ya... so I didn't say nothing... u know I can't be mad at u for long... a few hours is all it takes, n then I'm usually fine... but that's NOT the point... the point is, u need to take me more seriously! don't just be like "oh she's just over reacting, she'll get over it blablabla" I hate that!
n the way u said sorry "iya sorry blablabla" kelanjutan dr sorry nya itu yg bikin gw tambah eneg...kayak gak tulus... malah sarcastic gitu... nusuk bgt... bukan kata2 sorry lo yg gw mau... I want u to take me more seriously n not just take for granted the fact that I love u very much so u can do whatever n I won't love u any less... gw mau lo lebih mikirin soal perasaan gw juga...
jgn krn gw "in control" atau gw cuek atau gw bisa handle trus lo salah gunain...
trus kalo dah ngaku salah tuh selalu ada buntutnya... yg buntut2nya selalu balikin blame ke gw! jd kayaknya gw yg jahat n gak mikirin perasaan elo n gw yg gak ada pengertian dll...
lo tuh bener bener susah di ngertiin , gw sendiri ini hari ke 4 gw ga bisa tidur ! ===> hahaha, well, mister, u're not exactly easy to understand either!
dan gw udah bilang sorry pun masih tetep aja di bilang gini gitu bla bla bla .. ==> sorry sorry, tp lo tau gak kenapa gw marah n lo ngerti gak apa yg gw mau? gak kan...makanya gw tambah eneg pas lo bilang sorry, apalagi yg ada buntutnya yg gak enakin... tssss
udah lah, pokoknya gw minta laen kali jgn anggep remeh perasaan gw n kalo becanda ya mikir dulu n make sure ditulisan tuh kalo gw baca ya gw gak misunderstand... yg jelas dikit kalo becanda! kalo lo ngomong sama nulis kan laen bgt... mana gw tau lo becanda atau gak, gw kan gak bisa liat lo nahan ketawa, dll...
saat itu gimana sih reaksi gw ? pertama trima telphone gw berusaha nyantai , habis itu kan gw juga diem . .. kok rasa nya elu dendam bgt dgn hal ini ..==> gw bukannya dendam... gw sakit ati aja krn lo expect gw utk otomatis tau kenapa gw gak perlu takut dll... padahal gw gak tau sama sekali! lo bayangin gak sihhhhh... susah bener gw mau jelasinnya... mungkin buat lo soal ini tuh nothing... tp buat gw, it's a BIG thing! kalo sampe gw hamil beneran, hidup gw ancur... my life would be ruined, my family's name would be ruined, my future would be ruined, everything would be messed up! n lo dgn santainya bilang "gw tanggung jawab blablabla" it's not that! I don't doubt that u will take responsibility... gw gak kawatir soal itu, ngerti gak sih loooo... it just CANNOT happen! susah dah utk lo ngerti soal ini... gak bakal juga kali. apalagi dgn lo sms "gak bakal, tenang aja" tssssss... kasih garansi buta gitu, tanpa jelasin kenapa gak bakal, dll... emang lo pikir gw bisa baca pikiran lo kaliii??? gw tuh down yg bener2 down tau! u have no idea! gw 2 hr sampe pucet, keringet dingin, takut setengah mampus, tidur mimpi buruk terus, mau nangis teriak2, ngomong sama org aja rasanya susah setengah mampus krn gw nahan nangis n nahan eneg n nahan perasaan yg bener2 uggghhhh... belon pernah gw rasain tuh kayak gitu! rasa yg bener2 mau mampus yg gw tuh sampe sempet mikir mau beli obat tidur n telen obat sebotol! gila kan gw sampe kepikir gitu... ya itu yg gw rasain! segitu intensenya n lo gak ngerti! buat lo tetep aja no big deal krn lo bakal tanggung jawab n gw gak bakal hamil juga dll... but I didn't know none of that at the time...u never explained it to me! ngerti??? jd udah sepantesnya kalo gw bener2 anggep masalah ini big deal...krn gw sampe suicidal! kalo lo gak jelasin hr itu juga, mungkin gw udah mati sekarang, ngerti??? I was seriously thinking of killing myself!
anyways, I'm tired, goin to bed...besok kerja ... gw dah gak marah ato kesel... tp gw minta jgn selalu anggep enteng semuanya! have fun with GG
L u 2 much,
M
posted by si Monyet at Friday, July 08, 2005
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